Christina Vo.

I don't know if she's into me. We've only talked a few times. She does return my calls. I know that's being nice but I keep hoping for more. After all, she was the one who came up to me. There has to be something she sees in me that no other girl so far has seen.

And that makes me wonder. It's been on my mind these past few days. What is it that made her approach me, besides the fact that my story was "touching"? Would things have been different if I chose not to tell that story? I don't know myself. I give myself the possible scenarios and I'm just not so sure about it. I've been single for six months, which is half a year and I've finally moved on from my past relationship. But when I think I'm free from all worries, life snaps me back into the vortex of interest and attraction. It was hard getting over my first real love, it really set me back quite a number. Now I'm cautious of what may and can happen. I'm playing my cards carefully. Fate does not deal me a cruel hand, I deal the cards myself. I know not what can be possible and impossible. Just when my detachment from love sprouted its first roots, it is ripped out by force. Can the timing be anymore perfect?

The things called love are just...

Go away.

You want to know what annoys me more than wannabes and people who don't signal?


And that I also cannot understand?


Girls. Especially those who complain and whine about their bfs acting like stupid idiots and not doing a damn thing about it.


I can only understand women.


Maybe my expectations are too high.

Pisces.

So I took this supposed astrology quiz about my birth calendar on FB.

And this is what it says:

~ The Week Of The Loner - Pisces 2 March 3 - 10 ~

You live in a private world all your own. Your home is a retreat from the world, where you admit very few. You tend to isolate yourself more then what is good for you. You have a distinct dislike for superficiality; you mistrust loud, aggressive or pushy people and find it hard to work with people who lack sensitivity. Grace, honesty and an unassailable aesthetic and moral code prevent you from acting underhandedly or particularly hurtful. You have elegance and grace in all that you do, you are a great admirer of sensuous beauty, particularly in people and paintings and you give your home a special touch. You have a strong soulful side and have empathy for all forms of human suffering. You see a distinct difference between being lonely (which you rarely are) and being alone (which you are often) You can become addicted easily to drugs, drink, sex. You crave peak experiences. You ask only to be accepted as you really are. You have few friends that you are close and loyal to. You can be snagged by a pretty face, sensuous voice or alluring body. Once attached to someone it becomes an addiction and when you decide to be free of your love object you experience powerful separation anxiety. Strengths: Soulful – Intimate – Graceful Weaknesses: Reclusive – Disappointed – Suffering .


It's scary accurate o_o. Like Bang says: "On the spot."

T2: Revenge Of The Fallen.

I watched Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen tonight.


It. was. EPIC.


Ending was kinda anti-climatic. I won't ruin it for you though :]. Go see it.


DO IT.


And yep, Megan Fox is still hot. Those eyes...so mesmerizing.

Sad Day.

R.I.P. Michael Jackson. You were boss. Amazing singing voice and fluid dance steps. No one can imitate what you do. It's so sudden that you had to leave us but we will always remember you as The King Of Pop. Always.

:D:D:D:D:D

Something that happened yesterday made me really happy. So happy that I forgot to blog about it.

So here we go:

I get to class around 10, sit down and wait for the prof. to arrive. In the mean time, I tune up some jams on my ipod [Relient K ftw] for about 15 min. until the prof. comes. He tells us to arrange the seating so that we all sit in a circle facing one another. We do self-introductions where everyone gives everyone else a lil' background on themselves. It gets to me. Like always, I'm nervous because I am never good at these kinds of things [though I have to say, I improved a lot more than before]. Anyway, I tell how I came here when I was 2, be the youngest of 4 sons, and how I take care of my mom and clean up after my 25+ year old brothers who always leave junk around the house. I also listed that I enjoyed art and other random shit. Then I went on about my childhood and how it was like growing up. I told them this one story that I have rarely shared with anyone until now. When I was younger, my aunts and uncles would always ask me, "How come you don't look like any of your siblings or either of your parents?" I had no answer for them. Like the curious little boy that I was, I went to ask my mom. She said: "Oh. We found you in a trash can one night when your dad and I was walking home. Somebody left you there and didn't want you so we took you home with us and raised you." I can't even begin to describe how depressed I was at that point [can't blame me, a 8-year old brain can't possibly fathom shit like that.], and how I continued to feel like so for 3 or more years. Once I saw pictures of my mom of her younger self, that's when I realized it. I confronted her again and she was like, "Of course it isn't true. You're stupid if you believe something like that." ~_~.

That cracked the whole class up. Some went awwww. I didn't know whether to smile or not lol.

ANYWAYS. To the main point. Class ended shortly after everyone was done talking about themselves and we had to rearrange the chairs back to how they were before. When I was done, I turned around and some girl was like, "Hi. I'm Christina. I sit on the other side. I was really touched by your story. Aww. If you ever need a friend, I'm here for you." Awkward much....? I mean, she seems sweet and is cute but damn, I never expected something like that to happen.

Not many girls introduce themselves to me. In fact, I can't even remember the last time someone did that.

I felt so happy afterwards. She made my day :]. For once in a long time, my heart was at ease for a brief time.

I talked to her again today. I asked if she wanted to chill or something tomorrow and she said sure. :). She also invited me to sit next to her in class so we could get to know each other more. I know I sound like a total loser right now but bear with me, this is seriously the first time I've been this happy in awhile. If anything, I can't lose this chance to get to know someone who can acquiesce my pain. {Acquiesce is another word for ease.]

Sigh.

:D.

Happy Father's Day.

Happy Father's Day to all! :]. Do something for your pops for once.


~

A time to reminisce the memories when Dad was still around for me. All those days taking me to school and tutoring. All those times going out to eat. The times where the family would come together for a nice home-cooked meal. Sigh. I miss him so much. He was such a good role model. Hard working, dedicated and incredibly kind and compassionate about what he does. He always put family first, no matter what. Even old age couldn't stop him from working. He was 64 and was waiting tables at a senior retirement home. He's had so many jobs before, from the time he came to Vietnam to the time he got cancer. He always wanted the family to be happy, he kept working so he could provide for us, even when my brothers were already doing that themselves. He believed a person should never stop giving. He gave his soul to the family. He loved us all so much. Everybody misses him. He was always so pure and forthright. Never gambled nor drank. He even gave up smoking for my mom. Now that's love. A lot of people say I resemble my dad, with his morals, his generosity and his capacity in doing what's right for his family and friends. I hope for my sake, they are right. There would be no other person I'd try to emulate but my dad. In my eyes, he's a hero. Even though he's sitting up in heaven now, watching us go on with our everyday lives, he's smiling.
Not because he has attained peace and nirvana but because he can keep watching over us, guiding us so we can succeed in life, even when he's not here.

I miss you Dad. I really do. I just wish we were able to spend one last Father's Day together before you passed away. We'll do it in your memory. Regardless, you will always be here, in our hearts and you will never leave it.

I love you Dad.

Haruka Ayase.

Have any of you seen the J-drama Cyborg Girl? It's soo good. So many twists and turns. My head felt like it was spinning. I still haven't figured everything out...

I need to watch it again. I don't mind. The actress is so cute and adorable. The guy is so lame and helpless.

Kinda reminds me of me :\.

~EDIT



Haruka Ayase, the main lead in Cyborg Girl. She's also a model. Fuckin' fine, not just cute or adorable :D.

Sadness is what I demonstrate.

Funky dream last night. It didn't make any sense. She still lingers in my mind. Why won't she leave? I want you out of my life. Please go away. I've enough of you. You've wrecked me so bad.

Why is it that nobody can accept me for who I am? Am I different from all other guys? Is there something about me that girls can't understand?

Somebody tell me what's going on.

I need...comfort. I feel so cold and lonely. These nights just sitting here. These nights laying in bed, being unable to sleep because of the many thoughts running through my mind. Where is that one thought that is capable of keeping me happy and content? I've become such a frail and helpless person. Somebody help me forget.

Of course fool, it's not here. It's not going to be for a long time. Something is deliberately keeping me away from realizing the secret behind all this. For how long must I wait? And why?

~

Why....?

Day By Day - Big Bang.

PHEW, IS IT HOT TODAY OR WHAT? Tomorrow is going to be even worse ~_~.


Sam got crawfish and shrimp [I call them mudbugs] today from SJ Crawfish on capitol. It was gooooooood :D.



~

I had an epiphany last night. I'm suddenly drawn into the korean craze. Bang's shocked, Ming's surprised and Mel [Melissa] is happy.

Sigh. I knew this was going to happen sooner or later.

Rawr.

Friday Night - The Click Five.

Got woken up at 10, asked to take Sam's(brother) GF home and I do it, she offers to fill up the car. Come home, mess with teh comps for a while then head out to eat with Ming. He got chalupas from Taco Bell and I got mcChikkens (yes, that's how I spell it.....actually, it was a typo and I went with it.) with a large drink from Mickey D's. Chilled at his place until 8-ish, went home, ate curry and completely destroy Sam at SFIV, even with my scrubbish Ryu, Ken and Rose skills. Shouldn't have called me out :].

No idea what I'm doing tomorrow, maybe work out a bit or something. Outing on Wednesday with Melissa, Vereak and Val before Mel leaves for Texas. Froyo ftw :D.

~

Summer semester's starting in a fucking week. Breaks never last long enough.

Six Flags.

We went to Six Flags today.

Rode rides.

Walked around and saw some animals. Most of them were sleeping lol. We also watched a sea lion performance. Damn those sea lions are smart.

Went to Denny's and ate. Got home.

Tired and sleepy.

Good night.

Graduation was ok. Alot of people though. Went to eat pho afterwards and chilled at Bang's place. No golfland tonight and no bbq tomorrow. Bummer ~_~.

Drive - Incubus.

Got two graphic tees, smooth cargo shorts and skinny jeans.

:D.

Leyva's graduation tomorrow at 3 at Indy's big gym. I can't believe it. Patrick (cousin) is becoming a freshman in high school D:. They grow up so fast, I can still remember the times where he was such a handful as a toddler. Yes. I helped my mom babysit when I was younger. There's nothing wrong with that. I love kids. Plain and simple. Can't wait until I have a few of my own :].

Then the usual friday night outing with the guys. I don't know what I'd do on a friday night without them :].

And last but not least, BBQ courtesy of Tommy (eldest brother) on saturday. I love BBQ's. Did I mention that he's gonna give me his 21'' hdtv after he gets his 50''? I feel so bad for being such a moocher. Well, I applied at Van Huesen so we'll see what happens.

Mo' Money, Mo' Problems - Notorious B.I.G. ft. P. Diddy & Mase.

The muscles. They are forming. I am getting cut :D.

-

Gave my car a wash yesterday, phew it's fucking hard work. I rather take to it to a car wash next time. But then there's that feeling of a job well done when you do things yourself. I kinda like that feeling.

I applied to Van Huesen, yes the one at G-Mall. I desperately need this job. I really hope I get an interview, then get hired. *Prays. I don't really care if I have to deal with teeny boppers thuggin' out with their oversized hats and gang-affiliated attire that they're not even aware it's gang-affiliated, money is money. I need money to spend. I owe several people dinners ~_~. Damn me and my promises.

Yes, Tammy. If I get hired and once I get my paycheck, I'll get you your sushi.

FUCK.

I. hate. this.

Hard.



~

Hangover was a really good movie.

Day at Nancy's

Hung out with Nancy [Hi Nancy, if you're reading this :] ] for the whole day today. We were just gonna be outside and talk and whatnot but in the middle of our conversation, she got stung by a bee and we both started going crazy a lil'. Luckily, I pulled it out in time and we went inside her house so she could get some ice on it. It swelled but a hour later, it seemed okay. Her friend Ian from middle school came by and we all hung out together. We watched movies, ate junk food, read web comics and told stories. Oh yeah, we also took lots of weird pictures because Nancy felt like camera whoring lol. She had this really cool Clone Trooper helmet from Star Wars and I could NOT resist wearing it. I think half the time I was there, it was on me :D. I also saw Juno for the first time, although I didn't really get to pay attention because Nancy was ribbon-dancing in front of me. Not that I have a problem with that of course :]. She's really good at it.

And yeah, it was a really cool day. Her boyfriend dropped by for a few minutes, it felt kinda awkward but w/e lol. I just got home, I didn't even expect to hang around for all that long, maybe for a few hours but I ended up spending the whole day there. Again, not that I have a problem :]. We should do it again sometime.